Before you

Before you, my life was an empty canvas,
Where I experimented with colors.
But none appeared on it.
I thought my vision was impaired.
But you taught me,
That the right colors are yet to get splashed on it.

Before you, my life was a tuneless melody,
Where the words ordered themselves in unruly rhymes.
But no magic emerged from it.
But you taught me,
That the right strains are yet to be notated on it.

Before you, my life was an absurd story,
Where the characters bore no meaning at all.
But your love transformed it,
Filled it with melodies, colors and words,
Which knitted the wonderful tale of our love
In colorful threads,
Kneaded with a golden needle
And perfumed with fragrances from paradise.

Before you, life was not Life;
I was not me.

Before you, my love,
There was no light in my life;
No love.

I love you!

My Solitude

There ends that beautiful dawn of endless love,
In utter misery and sorrow….
I hoped that it was true …
Eternal.
But it all turned out to be nothing but a joke;
I am yet again, a perfect fool.
I smile bravely….
Trying to prove that I knew it all along…
That I knew it was all one perfectly planned prank!
That I was letting him fool me…
But deep down, I know that I love him …
I still do….
Hating the person you love the most;
It’s like killing every living component of your physical frame..
It’s like sucking out every drop of joy after reaching the utmost heights of happiness….

I smile….
Bravely.
I say nothing …
He has now turned his back to me…
But I smile..
Bravely.
Tears roll down my cheeks but I hide them…
Like I always do…
Camouflaging emotions…
My best ability…

But my heart is breaking apart…
You have made a fool out of me….
No.
I have made a fool of myself…

I walk out of the room…
The glass doors mock me….
I feel lost …
Nobody there to leave spools of wool for me,
So that I do not lose my way amidst the nasty maze of this vicious world…..
Nobody there to hold my hands and tell me it’s going to be all right…
No warm embraces waiting out there to make me feel better…
No one out there for me….
I am all alone…
Solitude is my only friend…
I walk along the deserted path of life….
Stumbling here and there…
All alone…
Nobody to give a helping hand…
Solitude is my god…
Solitude, my sun…
Solitude, my air…
Solitude! Thou art me!

Adieu

The wintry birds have all started to fly towards their cozy nests now…
The starry sky has set itself to the glum mood of the hour …
I sat there alone gazing at the twilight that is fading now…
And my mind was a maelstrom of memories dearest to us both …

Once we used to sit together on this very meadow…
Blanket-clad.
On twilights as these we used to sing out loud….
Teasing the passing winds ….
Telling them that we are much more in love than them…
And we are in love forever whilst they, they change their lovers every other day!
How we imitated the cuckoos voices …
How we spread the warmth of our love beyond the horizons….
How a vitalizing energy formed between our eyes when our gazes met…
And how they caused sandstorms in the faraway desert….
And turbulences in the wide sea before us…
The ecstatic nights and the romantic snowy dawns……


Now there is nothing left other than the memories that pierce my heart like needles sharp…
Nothing other than the void that you have left in me and my life…..
Stillness.
The calm and dead sea before me…
Nowhere to go….
No one to love….
Just a step more ….
That I should take now….
So that we could both be together...
For the rest of the eternity …
The wide sea awaits me…
For me, the sea is your arms…
Wide open; waiting for me…
And here I come my love…
Adieu, Adieu Life!

The Dream Cloak

I slowly pulled up my blanket
The pure white blanket of dreams
I slept peacefully under its warmth
Because once you are safely cuddled under it,
You may not remember even yourself.
You could be a Juliet or an Aphrodite;
Or an Apollo or a Caesar
And you could rule the world
And own everything you wanted.
You can even own love and happiness;
Disown sorrows and failures.
Fly away to a beautiful land of fairies and imps
Or dance away all night in a masquerade ball
With your beloved, who would never be yours in life.
You can do whatever under and beyond this wide blue night sky
But soon the Sun would rise
And your stars of the night would be seen no more.
You will wake up to face the weary world all by yourself;
No loving face to greet you good morning,
No chariots to take you wherever you need to be,
No spirits to carry out your commands,
No Prince Charming or Sleeping Beauty to be seen near or far,
No fairy godmother to help you out,
Nothing seems to be right and everything seems to be wrong.
Life would soon cease to be,
And night will soon stop coming to me
With that adored blanket of mine.
And I will sleep forever
That Eternal Sleep;
No dreams
No Nothings.

Tale Of Love

No longer do I understand the fairytales
Because no longer can they fool me
Because now my heart is torn apart
And now it realizes that there is no hope left


I once hoped to live forever after
In peace and harmony
And with my beloved prince
But now I know its all one big lie
Because those who love
Would never gain love
But always lose it
All love knows is but pain
It speaks about its pain in many tongues
We can see it orating its pain everywhere
Through art, through science and even through war
Love bleeds to its own ominous death
But there is nobody to weep over its dead body
Other than Love himself.
Love dies a quiet and painful death
And there dies with it the body that holds it.


I once was under its magic
And thought my hope and prayers would lead me to my heaven
But I had to die
To know that no prince will ever come for me
And all that I have to look back in life
Is the pain that love propagated and emphasized.

My life is a desert
One which never knew the touch of human feet
My love for life died away
And I was shattered to pieces
I withered away with time
Waiting all alone in my castle
For my prince charming to come
And carry me back with him on his serene white horse
But nobody came
Because love is but a lie
A lie that fools you ever so often
Showing you colorful dreams of a brighter tomorrow
But in reality is nothing but bitter pain
That two loving hearts cast upon each other
And endure, yearning for each other
Ever so more with each passing day and night
But never ever would they see the sunrise of it
Because it is a mirage that is surrounded with night
The endless night of pain.

Invocation

I am nothing but a lifeless lyre at your feet.
O Muses, hear me! O hear me cry!
I beg at your feet, covered with lotus petals
That were born from the blood of my bruised heart.


O hear, Mighty Princesses,
And let your divine music play through me,
Let it awake my Self that is well asleep
Amidst the din and violence of my century.


Raise my soul from its sleep eternal,
And show me the glorious nature of this world.
So that I could draw before those thousands of ignorant eyes,
The unknown paradise upon which they tread often
Only to step on it and trample it as if it’s vile mud or an ugly thorn bush.


Let your blessings ethereal flow through my veins.
So that I could feel the pain of the tramp who was once Our King.
Or, so that I could weep with the swain who mourns Orpheus beloved.
Or I might fight the mighty waves with the unfortunate sire, Cuchulain.
Or I might so as much save the Lovers from Fate that once met Juliet and her Romeo.


But now, I am all incapable of weaving the magical verses.
Because now have the Muses turned their faces away from me.
But I will keep on weaving with threads invisible.
But I will keep on invoking you with good faith.
And I will keep on hoping
That some day you will hear my moans too
Like with my Beloved.

Breeze of Love

A fresh breeze brushed her hands across your face
And I, from far watched her jealously.
How I wish to be that lively breeze So that I could touch you once
To know that you are real.
Because for me, you are too unbelievably unreal to exist.

How could Gods be walking on earth like this?
How could all beauty be captured in one single human form?
How could somebody be the epitome of perfection ……………………
While others are so unwarily striving to survive?

I sat there staring at my Angel…..
Who was busy chatting away with his pals…..
He would never know I ever existed……
He would never ever smile at me the way he does in my dreams………

And he got up…..
And my heart leapt…..
Oh! When will I ever see him?
He turned his back to me.
And walked away.

I could feel my heart shattering…..
I sat there…..All alone…..
Melancholy could never sound more melodious than now………
Oh! How I wish it all to be a nightmare……………….
Tears trickled down my cheeks…………………………………



Cry not love………….
A voice transcended into my sensual ears…
I looked up ………..

Oh! That angelic smile….
His smile…. So ethereal……..

Desire

I love you…….
And you love me more…………….

You see my picture…..
Where I hold a rose close to my heart….
And you wish …
“Only if I were………….”

And then we talk…………..
And talk…… and talk …..!
You her my voice again and again
Al l in your head……………..
Like a mystical chant
Or a witch’s dark spell.

And desire takes over you……..
The voice alone can’t sate your pain…..

You need to have my scent drown you
In an ocean of ecstasy that you dream of…..

You need to hold me close to you
To know for yourself that I am real………….

You need, and need, and need!

Love you….Forever

Relive your dreams…
Wake up…
Start life anew…
For you…
And for me…


Love, dear Love…
Wake up, for me…
From thy sleep, eternal.

Come. Sit by my side….
And rest your head on my lap…
Once more… Just once more…

So that I could tell you….
I could tell you, that
How warm your breath makes me feel…

Like a thousand fires burning my skin....With desire…
Like a fountain of joy….spilling all over my body….
Like an ancient magic spell…that’s working its way upon me…..


Or so that I could simply tell you…0nce more…
That I love you…
For ever…
And ever more….

Love’s Touch

My lips trembled….
As he moved his fingers against them.

My throat quivered…..
As I felt his intense gaze upon mine.

I slowly wrapped my arms around him…
So did he…
So that we couldn’t lose each other…
So that we’d be safe from the outer world…

No matter what …
Whatever may happen around us…

There would be nobody to disturb us….
And only Eternity ahead of us….

How sweet could Love be?

The River of Woes….

I cried a river for myself.

So that I could die drowning in it.

I swam ashore to realize……

That life can never be this easily dealt with ….

Then how could Death be?

Laughing bitterly, I climbed to the banks…..

My feet sunk into the mud………

No longer can mud defile me,

‘Cause I am already dirtied from body to soul

By the forces of evil

Who torture His angels…..

Angels of the Dark

I ran…..
As fast as I could.
It was night time…
Eerie and Dark…
And soon, Exhaustion took over me….
Gifting me with a labored breath.

I looked about to see….
To see if I could find that ray of hope……
But hope is beyond the scope of my Fate…

I am born to suffer
Rather luxuriously, I daresay
Which places it next to hell
Living Hell.
“Hell on Earth.”

For an Angel…..



But still , I run.
I try to run from my fate.
And I sigh; relieved.
Before the Fates take me over once again
And take me back
Back to my Personal Hell
Custom-made.