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Monday, June 4, 2012

Welcome back or Adieu ?

Hello ! (To myself as I don't believe anyone's going to read this blog . Period . ) 


I have been away for a long time now . That's partly due to my busy schedule and partly because I have another blog to look after https://nandinipradeep.wordpress.com/) .


I miss you blogger , as you were my first blog, but it's time to move on . 


Now if I don't post here , don't be angry with me because this is how life is . You have to accept it .


Meanwhile, let me add this : I will be Silverdoe forever and evermore .  This is a promise ! 


And I'd also like to thank everyone who read the stupid stuff I wrote and encouraged me to scribble . It meant the world to me, guys . Really . Sending positive thoughts your way . Be safe ! 



Hoping to see you again  . 




Yours ,




Silverdoe 



Monday, August 8, 2011

What's my problem!

You say girls are complicated and it's impossible to understand them.

I say fine, who asked you to?

You say "Look at that movie. It's all about how girls play with us poor boys. Girls are mean and bad."

I say “Okay. Now I got to sit and do movie listing for you? Seriously, I don't have the time to sit and make notes on what to say and do in order to ridicule the opposite sex. And the mean and bad blah blah blah part: I thought its okay to be human."

You say one can never trust a girl: they are like a walking talking version of your daily newspaper.

I say fine, but every time a girl dumps you or every time something bad happens or if you want to talk about how bad rest of your friends are, why do you come running to a girl? Did that girl make all that happen?

You go crazy for a girl if you think she's unattainable. But once she falls for you, you dump her for a silly reason and you’d be depressed all the time and tell your buddies that she left you.

And if she dumps you for whom you are, then she's a bitch?

You talk about how barbaric people are to kill female fetuses and how girls have a right to be born in the world as much as boys and how they should be given every right in our nation that the men exercise and yet (!) when you hear there are three or four girls in a family, you go “Oh! Three girls? How are they going to marry them off?" And so much more.

And those girls would want to ask, "Who made this system of giving/accepting dowry in the first place? Would YOU say no to dowry? And above all, three boys in a family == okay but three girls, not okay? "

And you ask what my problem is.

And I tell you that I've got no problems. But apparently, I've somehow become your problem.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

My Faerie Princess

Once in a pea-pod slept a faerie princess;

Who slept for nineteen years, and woke up on her “nineteenth” sunup.

She flew across the faerie woods, enthralled with her fiery power;

She waltzed, she sang, she felt upbeat like some glam- girl in a svelte Chanel.

But our poor Princess didn’t know yet that

She’s wandered into the land of ‘Real’

And the Prince of Real, who was but out riding, reached out to her,

And pulled her to him with the magic of his winsome smile.

She was so in trance that she touched with her lips the lips of that young lad.

He scooped her up and later, hid her well in his luxurious chamber [custom-made].

She was fed well, taught well but her fairy wings had shredded off well too!

She cried for it but our real ‘Real’ Prince wiped her tears like a true gentleman.

He warmed her heart and her body as well

And prayed she’d tell this to no one.

Our poor little Doll listened to him but the vermin of guilt raped her thoughts.

One fine morning, her fairy godmother visited her in her dreams

To tell her that she is to bear

The consequences of losing her blossoms of womanly youth

To her charming dear ‘Real’ Prince.

She screamed out loud and sent for the Prince

A message in distress.

He rushed to his dame like some country Knight

And begged for the cause of her mournful frown.

She quoth’d that he’d said t’was all alright but alack! –she’s no more pure!

And now she’s doomed to bear his seed

And will be damned in the eyes of all.

And hence she begged: “Oh dear ‘Real’ Prince, marry me and make me yours!”

He shrugged her off and called his guards

And asked them to take her where she’d pine for her sins.

The ‘Real’ mother-Queen asked him why

He’d sent his Doll to the dreary cell

In the dungeon deep down in the earth

Where she’d be scared as hell!

He yelled at her and so quoth he: “Oh she’s but a bloody whore, a bitch!”

Thus heard our Princess from some random maid

And cursed she the morn that had woken her up

From her fairy oh-so-lovely bower!

Then she took a shower and she had the power

To go get that Eternal Lover.

“Love, thy name is DEATH.”

Thursday, July 8, 2010

The Fear of Darkness

I stood there feeling strangled by the dark shadows of love.

I pleaded, I cried; I need some sane and soothing words.

I looked at the shadows and I cried out aloud;

My voice personified my pain.

I looked at the shadows and I cried out aloud;

My piteous look spoke more than those painful incoherencies.

I pleaded: “Don’t push me, Love, to the edges of love;

I might fall out of it.”

My piteous looks spoke more than those painful incoherencies.

I could see the shadows being wiped away

With a tremendous force of love,

And my beloved, who took pity on me, saved me from those shadows.

I could see the shadows being wiped away

And he held me tight in those strong arms of a knight.

And I was the kitten; fragile and meek.

I slept all night and spend all day in those mighty arms.

And he held me tight in those strong arms of a knight.

And I felt secure once again amidst these shadowy beings.

I could sense the love; I could taste the lust.

I spent all my life in the embrace of those arms.

And I felt secure once again amidst these shadowy beings.

I nurtured my Love’s love and I bore him his fruits.

I gave him all my life and he gave me all his love.

And for centuries we fought the darkness before being one with it.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

My World

In my world, I am a toy doll.

Everybody wants me in their life

Just to exhibit me in their exquisite showcase.

In my world, I am a toy doll.

Everybody wants me in their life

But nobody really cares.

In my world, I am a toy doll.

Everybody talk of me

But nobody listens to me.

In my world, I am a toy doll.

Everybody strangles me by my neck

And imagines I am something reparable.

In my world, I am a toy doll.

Kids love me

Adults scorn.

In my world, I am a toy doll.

They hug me at first

And throw me away in the next second itself.

In my world, I am a toy doll.

I might be good enough;

But they always look for a better deal.

In my world, I am a toy doll.

Left alone in a corner,

I cry but for everybody else, I am smiling.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

A Love Affair

“The wind was still alone when it met the sea. She, on her beauteous abode, resided so peacefully. On seeing the wind, she eloquently spoke forth in a coquettish voice, a greeting so melancholic. The wind felt the depth of her melancholy which was just the same as his. He spoke to her like a gentleman, a knight of armor, a daring hero. She flushed red in her shyness. The sun hid itself behind the curtains, closing his eyes on the lovers. Their love blossomed and matured, like grapes that once bloomed and then on ripening is plucked to make wine out of and like that wine which matures to give the best of results. But the Fates could not grant them any more of their precious Time to while away in silly things such as romance. And they sent without a warning, the villainous Storm. He went and swept away the wind, who in a flash of the light lost the sight of his Amour. He cursed the Storm, the Fates, the Sea – of whose beauty left him bewitched; forgot about his vows to serve the Earth, the Sand, the Green, the Grey. The Sea still waits for her beloved wind and sheds tears years after year. He comes and goes but never makes love. He scorns her, beats her, treats her bad. But still she loves him, loves him so!”

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Valentine’s Day

“Red dress, black chandelier earrings, red lipstick, black crystal charm…. Okay. I think that’s all. That’s the dress code for the Valentine’s Day party hosted by Kian’s best friend Rosa. How do I look?”, asked Feroza to her sister Zia.

“You look great, sis”, chipped in Zia. “Really cool, if you ask me, but Kian might find you …. Umm... Hot??” Feroza blushed furiously. “Oh come on, Zia! We’ve been dating since two years. He must be bored with me now.” She said quietly. Zia disagreed loudly. “Oh come on!!! That’s why he’s gifted you this beautiful red dress and all those accessories and he’s even going to come pick you up? He loves you so much! I can see that in his eyes.” “He gifted all these because he doesn’t want me to embarrass him in front of his friends. That’s all. I tell you, he is bored with me. And I think he will dump me sooner than later.”

“Sis, you are such a pessimist! I don’t think so! I think he is going to propose you for marriage. Let’s not fight on this; otherwise you are going to make him wait.”

Feroza quickly gathered her leathery red handbag and walked downstairs. It’s the first time in two years that they are actually having a night out. Even though they live in the States, she never used to party out late with her friends because Feroza always valued her culture and its traditions. She was an Indian Muslim and she was proud of that fact.

When she reached downstairs, she could see Kian waiting in the living room, with her dad. He was looking ravishingly handsome. And she daren’t take her eyes off him. She was enchanted by his charming aura. She realized that she was gaping at him like some dumb schoolgirl and she looked away. Her dad was quite apprehensive about the party at first but then agreed when Kian, with his charming smile and confident speech, talked with him and explained things carefully to him. He promised dad that there won’t be anything happening over there that would hurt our religious sentiments. And her dad was impressed, one must say.

As soon as he saw her, he stood up like a thorough gentleman, and there was a glittery shine in his eyes that made her stomach grumble. He smiled innocently and said goodbye to dad and walked towards Feroza. She stood there shyly. He offered his hand and led her out to his car. It matched perfectly with her outfit: a red Camaro Convertible. They drove quietly to Rosa’s beach-house, with some occasional chit-chat about various things. And in less than an hour they reached a beautiful bungalow, illuminated with thousands of tiny bulbs. On entering the lobby, Feroza could see that the entire place was decorated with blue fibre-optic lights. It was extremely beautiful. Feroza stood there, stunned. Kian, with a naughty smile, urged her to walk forward. They reached a huge pool, again decorated with fibre-optic lights and flowers. There was a tiny barrier around the pool made out of flowers and intricate wires. It all looked exquisite. This was all very new to Feroza. Kian introduced her to an extremely good-looking girl, dressed in all red, completely following the dress code. That was Rosa, Kian’s friend. She had her boyfriend Martin with her. He was as attractive as his girl. They made a great couple, in short. Unlike Kian and Feroza, who were extremely different. Kian was tall, well-built, handsome, and very attractive; Feroza was kind of chubby, short, thick-browed, dark and all that. She always felt uncomfortable when people look at her as if they wanted to ask “What the hell is a girl like that doing with a guy like this?”

He then led her to a table, which was dimly lit and again, decorated with luminous blue fibre-optic lights. He looked at her with immense romance and passion and there she was, blushing like an idiot. He chuckled and asked, “What shall I get thee, my lady? Fresh fruit juices? Or would you like to try something different?” He asked with a wink. She reddened furthermore and shyly replied that she wouldn’t have anything with alcohol in it. He smiled lovingly and went away to get his lady a drink.

Seated on a table that was the corner-most of tables in that place, Feroza waited for Kian. It was then that an eerie shadow emerged from the tiny corridor in front of her. It was that of a woman. She must be in her early twenties. Dark-haired, slightly dark in complexion as well, her eyes where coaled thickly and she was overall very seductive. She wore a black leather jacket and black stiletto boots. Her blue jeans had a worn-out look; but still they looked great on her curvy figure. Her lips were colored with dark red lip-gloss that made them look like ripe cherries. She had a bright, blue and white scarf tied to her head, covering her wild and wavy hair. She wore long beads that gave her a gypsy look. Feroza couldn’t take her eyes off that woman and that made her uncomfortable. Her eyes were fixed to that ethereal beauty before her. She could see the vague figure of a man moving towards her but she couldn’t identify the person since her eyes were glued on ……….

“Tarika!”, Kian exclaimed. “Oh my God! Can I believe my eyes or what? Where the hell where you all these years? Missed you a lot baby!”, he breathed in, hugging her. “Come on, sit with me, I have lots to tell you”, he said, like a little boy who is about to tell his mom what all happened at school that day. Feroza couldn’t believe her eyes. She felt frustrated, furious, envious, jealous, and what not! Kian led Tarika to their table and he pulled in an extra chair from nearby and seated her. “Now tell me. Where were you? What are you doing these days? My god! It’s been a millennium since I last saw you!”

Tarika laughed, and one must acknowledge, in a rather sexy way. Her laugh was enough to turn people on. “Oh Kian! Stop that! You are still that baby, aren’t you! Good heavens, whenever are you going to grow up baby!”, she said, pulling at his cheeks affectionately. He chuckled. “Now don’t change the topic. I want to hear it all.”

“Well well well! Where have I stranded myself now, eh? Ha ha. Okay. I was on a tour, let’s say, a search. I was just following my own mind and therefore, I travelled parts of Europe, Africa, and Asia, especially China, India, and all. Enchanting, I daresay. I think I am getting that peace of mind now, which I hardly got at home. I have a gang who travel with me. We are all, let’s say, companions of the night. We travel along mostly at nighttime. Rest during daytime in areas with lots of woods and all. Now now! I don’t want you to think that I am in search of “divine intervention” or something of the sort.” Saying this, she laughed heartily. It was then that she saw Feroza. “Oh la la! Who have we got here? Your wife?”, she asked Kian. “You know I won’t marry without you around, don’t you? This is Feroza. Well, you can call her my girlfriend; but I would say she is my…. You will know tonight!” Feroza was utterly confused at this. Maybe he is going to dump her and that would make her his ex. Of course! He’s got his sweetheart now. Why would he even want her now?He’s got this extremely mouthwatering dessert of a woman. Allah! She sighed.

“Okay. I will get you two something to drink. Baby, what would you drink? A martini for my dame?”, Kian asked, smugly. “I want some plain water, do you get that over here?”, Tarika questioned mockingly. “Okay, that broke my heart. You are “refined” now? Ha ha!” Kian joked. “Well, you can say that. Now you better get going. I am thirsty. I rode my bike all the way here from my place. You know the place, still, I suppose.” “Whoa! How did you even manage that? You were that girl who could hardly walk on two feet. You ride now? I am impressed. Anyways, your valet at your service, Madame. I’ll be right back. You two have a comfy time.”

Tarika turned to Feroza and smiled sweetly. Subhan allah! Feroza couldn’t think of not falling for this woman’s sweetness. “How long have you been together?”, asked Tarika. Oh yeah! Now the bitch wants to know if our relationship is strong or not, thought Feroza. “Well, we’ve been together for more than two years.” “Oh! That’s fantastic. As far as I have known him. He has never stuck on to a girl more than a month. So that is good news for you girl. He is serious about you.” “Well, I hope so. I love him a lot. Sometimes I wonder how a man like him would fall for a girl like me. I am just an Indian girl with no assets to flaunt.” Feroza answered testily, scanning Tarika enviously. Tarika giggled and that made Feroza feel lots better. She was nothing ethereal after all. She just looked better. “I suppose you are underestimating yourself, sis, because I don’t think there’s any other girl out here tonight, who could win Kian’s heart. I’ve known him since he was nine or ten. We went to school together. He was my best friend. I’ve always envied his life. Great family, good friends, girls after him all the time and where was I? I was a loner, no guy would ever look at me and my family was totally a nightmare. Divorced parents, brother dead in an accident, that too after snorting cocaine enough to kill an army. I hated my family. I lived here, at our country mansion, with a caretaker. Kian was my only friend.” Feroza could feel her heartbeats racing again. Is she here to get him back? Her childhood friend. Her only sweetheart? Feroza could feel beads of perspiration on her forehead.

“Okay girls, this is where your little chat ends. Here’s your drink. Let’s move to the lounge. There’s some dancing and fun going to happen. And some interesting announcements as well”, Kian said, joining them. He put an arm around Feroza and that made her heart jerk a little and then it came back to its normal position.

“Ladies and gentlemen”, announced Martin, “Tonight, we have a couple of announcements to do. Yes, we will have all the fun and frolic starting in a minute’s time and it will go on past midnight into the beautiful day of the Valentine’s. But before that, let me use this opportunity to announce something special. Something that’s going to make this night even more special for me and Rosa, my love, and also you all, my dear friends! I know you’ve guessed it by now, yes! We are getting married! This summer we are going to take the immortal vows of marriage and guess what, we are going to be proud parents this fall. I, by tying this diamond band on her wrist, makes Rosa Lamartine, my fiancĂ©e. And I promise to be with her through all seasons of life; may it be summer, spring, winter or autumn. Love you, Rosa”. And they kissed. And surprisingly Kian took over the microphone.

“Years ago, when my best friend told me that she needs to find her inner self, I thought she was kidding. I let her go, knowing that she would realize how silly she was. But how wrong I was! Because today, when I met her, she was not the old silent girl she used to be. She was a new avatar altogether, if I could use that word. And I’ve lost my heart all over again to my childhood sweetheart. Come here, baby.” He walked off the dais towards Tarika and hugged her. Feroza was cold, from head to toe. She couldn’t believe her eyes. And what a total bitch Tarika was. There she was telling Feroza that Kian was all hers and now look at her, blushing like a rosebush. Feroza felt like slapping her. She felt dizzy. She could hear her heart pounding as Kian kneeled down to the ground before Tarika. He quietly took a small box from his pocket. And he slowly opened that box and suddenly there were many “ooh”s and “aah”s from the crowd. There lie in that a box a solitaire ring, so beautiful that people would think twice before answering “Who is more beautiful: Tarika? Or that ring?” Feroza felt sick. She could feel her stomach turning over. Her face and lips were so dry! And Kian took out the ring from that box. Tarika extended her left hand. Feroza closed her eyes in pain.

Darkness. Utter darkness. Feroza couldn’t see anything. She felt as if she was about to fall into a dark pit. Somewhere deep down. She felt like screaming.

That’s when a hand reached out to her and pulled her forward. When she opened her eye she could see Kian gently sliding in the magnificent solitaire ring on her chubby ring finger. She could feel her eyes being moistened with tears. Her feet felt so light. She reached forward and hugged Kian and started to burst out crying and then laughing all at once. Even she was confused at her reaction. But those around her, who were awestruck at the situation, quickly acknowledged the flow of energies between Kian and Feroza and everybody could clearly see how deeply in love they were. Breaking the embrace, he said,” And my princess thought I would leave her so easily? You were so wrong, baby”. Saying so he kissed her. “Now, my princess go and clean up her beautiful little face. I don’t want her to look sad when she tells her dad the good news. Go on, love. I’ll be waiting” he said smilingly and hugged her, “forever”, he breathed into her ears with a naughty grin.

Feroza never felt this happy in her entire life. She almost danced her way to the washroom. She saw herself in the mirror. How silly of her to think Kian would ever leave her! She washed her face and started touching up her makeup. Yes, now she looks better. She smiled at herself and turned to leave. She staggered a little when she saw Tarika at the doorway. She looked positively angry. Her sensuous face was flaming and her eyes were red and glowy. “I almost had him, do you know that? But you. Just because of you. I lost him. I’ve now lost him forever. Aargh! My head. It’s aching. I won’t forgive you. And you will pay for this.” Tarika jerked her head. It was pretty scary. She looked demented. She suddenly took out a knife from her jeans. It was tiny. Feroza wanted to scream out loud, to call out for help. But fear froze her insides. She knew that Tarika is going to kill her. Her whole body trembled. Tarika stormed towards her and got hold of her hands. She brought the knife closer to Feroza’s hand and she delicately cut opened her palm. Feroza let out a cry of pain and Tarika shushed her. And then she took the knife to her own wrist and sliced it open. She moaned in pain and Feroza felt Tarika’s pain as it serenaded through her beautiful face. And then, Tarika carefully closed in her wrist into Feroza’s palm. And she breathed in her last breath. Feroza stumbled down and started shaking her trying to wake her up. She screamed out loud for help. She felt helpless. Kian and few others paced in. Kian asked for an account of what had happened and Feroza told him that Tarika, who was heartbroken tried to murder Feroza first but then she decided not to and killed herself.

Kian felt terribly distraught for being the reason of his best friend’s death but he knew he couldn’t have done anything for her. Because he loved Feroza than anything in this world. He saw in her, his future, his babies’ mother. He knew she was the one for him ever since they met.

Kian led Feroza to the car. They both drove quietly to Feroza’s place. On walking in, Zia welcomed them both enthusiastically and told Feroza that Kian had already told them all about the plan and they were all on it. Feroza and Kian filled in on the mishap that took place at the Valentine’s Day party. Everybody was quite shaken at the thought of death on such an auspicious occasion. But still the moment was one of joy as Feroza is getting married to Kian.

Two years have passed now. Feroza and Kian are happily married and guess what? Feroza gave birth to a baby girl in the month of May. She was born on the same day a Feroza. Kian was ecstatic. Feroza was kind of annoyed. Nobody knows the reason though. As little Sarah grows older, her father sees glimpses of Tarika in her. And let me tell you, using my telepathic knowledge, Sarah is a gifted child. And She is very beautiful too, ethereal, one might describe her beauty. Kian often unknowingly blurts out to Feroza that Sarah is so much like Tarika. That makes Feroza happy. And need I tell you why?